Sometimes it can feel like that the circumstances you find yourself in are less than favourable. Ok that was polite, sometimes you can find yourself in a situation that just plain out right sucks. No sugar coating is going to make it look or feel any different. Life is life like that. It ain’t always a bed of roses.
I have been reminded lately of a quote I love from a piece of writing I have almost memorised….it feels so relevant to me as a reminder that things do happen for reasons. Many moons ago I was subject to a major change process at work, it was tough and tiresome and was handled poorly. I was left wondering why I had found myself in that situation, it was not fun at all. Now I find I am part of another major change as part of my job, this time leading the change, and I can draw on my experience from before, on how not to handle change, and use it today to help deliver change in a good way. Having not been through the poorly handled change, I would not have the direct experience to help me today.
“whether you know it or not, the universe is unfolding just as it should…” (from the Desiderata)
The simple words over the years have been the light at the end of tunnels on the days where I feel like I might just be swallowed up by the tunnel. The days where I question what the hell is going on or perhaps I feel like I have seriously accumulated some bad karma debt to find myself right here right now. You see, I am a searcher, I search for meaning in most things that I do. Call me crazy, and god knows I have called me crazy, but it helps me do what I do. It is what drives me to keep going more to the point knowing there is meaning and purpose.
What I have realised, is that whilst I may not see it at the time, the experience I am gaining from that very situation will be a valuable pearl of wisdom gained through direct experience that I will use later on. What I am mean is, the shitty time I might be having now, will help me later in life deal with another shitty time, or better still, help me prevent feeling shitty in the first place or even minimise how others may end up feeling shitty.
Just like the saying goes, even though you may not realise it, the universe is unfolding just as it is supposed to. Everything is happening as it needs to. Whilst I don’t want to get on the debate of belief in the universe or karma or destiny (I have already covered that here in case you are interested) my point is, that everything that is happening right now, good or bad, is shaping your future. Whether you like it or not, being in this moment, is what allows you to move into the next.
The thing with shitty times, it is easy to try and be all holier than thou and rant about being in the present moment, not getting caught up in the past or future, but the reality is for most of us mere mortals, unless we are the buddha, life dealing up shitty things sucks and hurts.
Acceptance of where you are, allowing yourself to actually feel what you are feeling, and then practising some loving kindness to yourself are some small things you can do to help yourself out. And to also know, that one day, you will be able to look back with knowing that it helped you in some small way be who you are today, which is a pretty amazing being.
If you are going through a shitty time, connect with people, and share the load. You are not alone, and should never feel like you have to walk the path by yourself. Big hugs to you x